Thursday, June 26, 2008

happy meal

remember how a trip to Mac will brighten up your day when you was just a child?

food, i thought is always something comforting to a otherwise dull day.
Isn't thats why we love chocolates so much?

the sight of your fav dish, the smell of the fragrance, the taste of the freshest ingredients, as u dig your teeth into every mouthful, do you actually feel much better after a good happy meal?

I used to. In fact, whenever i feel down, i just try to compensate it with a happy breakfast or lunch so that i will have a better day.

However, I no longer can now.

I wonder why.
These few days, I have been arguing a lot with Greg. I have distant myself from everyone around me. I am no longer funny nor happy.

I often try to self-medicate by indulging myself in that sinful large chunk of chocolate cake, or by eating my favourite food.
But yet, nowadays i still can't derive pleasure or feel happy after a happy meal.

I wish I am not like this too. I have been feeling so down that even I hate myself now. I hate myself for being such kind of a person. I hate myself for not trying hard enough to change for the better. I hate myself that after these few years, I am still the same old me.

Bad habits never die. Its so true for me.